JanMell Vanity Scripts #13: What is your brand of humor?

Working in a comedy club for more than a month now, we can say we've clearly distinguished how we make people laugh from that of our fellow comedians onstage. We have decided to be "clean," that is, do away from swearing and profanity just to elicit laughter. We tend to worship the great Jerry Seinfeld, who worked out 10 minutes of material

 from cellphones and bottled water and still be funny. But during one of our gigs, the flow of chit-chat caused one of our fellow comedians to talk about the tongue. Well, as we were expected to be spontaneous, our mind caused our tongue to utter an attempt at a green joke. 

"You know what the tongue is the strongest muscle in the body," we said.

"Bakit?" said the other comedian.

"Because it can lift a woman's body."

Nobody laughed. And nobody seemed to get our punchline. 

The other comedian retorted:

"Dili oy. Strongest na siya kay mao nay mutila sa k*ki ug sa ot*n."

The audience roared in laughter. For a moment we thought we were out of place. Geez. We are such a loser

JanMell Vanity Scripts #12: Parallel Universes and Love

It is our second overnight stay here in the laboratory. We still haven't got over our exhaustion from the previous overnight with barely 3 hours of sleep to re-energize and plenty of activities in the day to drain it out. We have to force ourselves to come here and leave our cat behind despite the strong urge to rest. 

While we are waiting for our samples to dry we are overcome by the feeling of being alone here in a cold, lifeless laboratory. The constant buzzing of the creaky air-conditioning unit seems to remind us of our solitude, like crickets humming in the silence of the night. We tighten our jacket, fold our arms and rested our head on the wall.

Sometimes, we wonder if this feeling is all there is for the rest of our life. It is our honest admission that we have felt alone since we were aware of our existence and we have always been curious about how things might be different if you have someone, who at all circumstances, can make you feel that you are never, never such.

Would life be more enjoyable if we have someone who would be so willing to bring us an umbrella when we're stuck in the rain instead of trembling in the cold while waiting for the rain to stop?

Would life be more worthwhile if we have someone to tell all our troubles to and assure us sweetly and affectionately after running our tears dry, that everything will work out fine?

Or in our case right now, would we be more inspired to finish our work when we have someone to keep us company even through our cellular phones or laptops only, informing that someone about the progress of our experiment instead of tightening our jackets, folding our arms and listening to the sound of silence?

Would life be truly lived if we have someone who would want to do everything for us as much as we desire to do everything for them?

As we stare at the empty beaker reflecting our emaciated face we are reminded of a line from the movie Moulin Rouge:

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return."

And yet as we continue to ponder we have realized in introspect that we will forever remain curious about these things. We have long accepted that there are questions we can never answer and events we can only experience if we're in a different, parallel universe. There are people like us who believe so, and our fate is best defined by the words of Harold Zidler from the same movie we quoted above, who told it to the main character, Santine who is terminally-ill:

"We are creatures of the underworld. We can't afford to love."

JanMell Vanity Scripts #11: How do you unwind?

I climb up a mountain with my friends. They gather young coconuts for its juice and meat. I stay at the shanty and read until I fall asleep. When I wake up, we're off to our next destination.

Then I go swimming with my friends. They play with the water like children in the summer, toss plastic bottles, laugh. I dip myself slowly until all of my body is wet then get off and sit silently on a rock, watching. When they do another round of swimming, I dry myself and go back to the cottage.

Then we go home at dusk. The moment my back hit the bed, I am fast asleep. I wake up before midnight and I write this vanity script. 

I write about how pleasurable it is for me to be sitting idly in a shanty on top of a mountain facing the vast sea, feeling the gentle wind whisper its journey in my ears. How exciting it is for me to read a book when I'm closer to the sky and how rewarding it is to take an energizing nap away from the hustle-bustle of the polluted city. 

I write about how I am able to have my own moments of silence amid the peals of laughter and gushing water while sitting in a rock and trembling with the cold. How much I enjoy watching the happiness of my friends, how the clear waters overwhelm me and render me silent so that I can hear myself telling me what I need to do with my life.

It may not be bursting with energy or done in the most cheerful of ways but that is how I unwind. After all, enjoyment is not measured by the extravagance of the get-away or the decibels of your laughter and merry-making. Rather, it is gauged upon the silent realization that when you go home, your heart becomes lighter when it once was too heavy.

Our blog sponsors spelling bee event

Last September 28 the Institute of Integrated Electrical Engineering Students (IIEES) MSU-IIT Chapter conducted a spelling bee competition and their president, Jeffrel Hermias invited us to sponsor the event, that is, serve as the quizmaster. We gladly accepted the offer. This is the first time that our blog sponsored a literary event and we were very excited. This serves as an affirmation of our purpose why we made this blog: to promote reading as a way to make more people informed and eradicate ignorance. Furthermore, we needed an avenue to promote our blog and we think this is just perfect.

 We have a book in our collection entitled The Mercury Visions of Louis Daguerre. Just saying. 

As prize, we gave away one of the books in our collection, Natural-Born Cyborgs: Minds, Technologies and the Future of Human Intelligence by Andy Clark to the champion, Ms. April Faith Manabat, a fourth year Electrical Engineering student. We think this might be an interesting read for an aspiring electrical engineer.

Congratulations to all of us. We hope to sponsor events such as these in the future. We believe engineering students do not fall behind in terms of literary skills but such hasty generalization exists. Thus we must work hand in hand to dispel that idea. Let us make them eat our literary dust.

Kid teaches us cat parenting

We sometimes forget to scoop poop. They stink as hell.. Read it in The Huffington Post.

Paintings, poems and nunchucks

Last September 13 we attended a poetry-reading and art exhibit at the behest of our friend, Seliz. It was organized by Odd Proyekto, and the poetry-reading and exhibit was in celebration of the release of Volume II of Odd Proyekto, a limited ciculation portfolio of visual and literary creations. 

Photos Courtesy of Odd Proyekto

The volume features different young and seasoned contributors from Iligan City as well as from all over the country.

It turned out that the poetry-reading was more casual than we expected. The contributors present were very unassuming to the point of refusing to read their poems because they felt shy. When they ran out of readers they asked us to read. We stood up and read Cityscape by Simon Anton Nino Diego. We think we mispronounced at least two words. Ha ha. 

Our friend, the psychedelic Seliz especially liked Luis Batchoy's Extra Super Special Batchoy with Egg. We think we know why.

Because it's supposed to be Odd, the event ended in a nunchucks exhibition by one of the contributors. 

Congratulations to the organizers. We need more people like you to further strengthen our artistic and literary force especially now when there are only a few of the profound and cultured left and everyone else has nothing in mind but Gangnam Style. 

To those who want to grab a copy of Odd Proyekto Volume II just contact them through their Facebook page. It's here.

Makabagong Bayanihan

We wrote this together with my good friend, Airess Casimero for an oration contest in MSU-Iligan Institute of Technology. It won 3rd place because it was not corny enough. We would like to think of this as our Buwan ng Wika article this year. Read on.

Sa mundong lumiliit --- dapat angking TALINO ay magamit upang PAGKAKAISA ng sambayananan ay makamit!

Sa aking mga kagalang-galang na tagapakinig, may nais lamang akong itanong sa inyong lahat at sana'y wag niyong ikagagalit.

“What's on your mind?”

Huwag niyo akong titigan na para bang ako'y isang “status box.” Opo, ang tinutukoy ko ay ang palagi nating kinakaharap na tanong sa bawat araw at bawat sandali na tila ba'y naging bahagi na ng ating buhay ang pagsagot sa katanungang ito. Sa bawat pagbukas natin ng ating mga “facebook accounts” bumubulagta sa ating harapan ang simpleng tanong na ito. Simpleng tanong na nagpabago sa ating pamamalagi sa mundong ibabaw.

Facebook. Isa lamang ito sa mga “social networking sites” na popular ngayon. Sa pamamagitan nito, ang minsang nawala, nagkakaroon ng pagkakataong muling magkita; ang di magkakilala, nagiging magkaibigan. Ikanga nila, isa kang “alien” o lamang-lupa kung wala kang “facebook account.” Ganyan kalaki ang bahaging ginagampanan ng mga social networking sites sa ating buhay.

Ang pagsikat ng mga social networking sites gaya ng Facebook ay nagpapatunay na hindi lamang ang paglobo ng populasyon ang sanhi kung bakit lumiliit ang mundo. Sa pagdami ng mga tao, dumami rin ang mga makabagong paraan ng pakikipagtalastasan. “Share” dito, “share “doon. “Like” dito, “Like” doon. “Comment” dito, “comment” doon. At sino ba ang hindi nawiwili sa napakaraming kaibigan na pwedeng i-chat?

Sadya mang napakalawak ng daigdig, pero dahil sa sadyang maparaan ang tao, mas lalo pang lumiit ang mundo. Ang milya-milyang distansya ay abot-tanaw na!

Marahil masasabi nating napakagaling ng naka-imbento ng Facebook! Isa itong malaking tulong sa ating sambayanan.

Hindi ba't ganyan naman talaga tayong mga tao? Gamit ang angking katalinuhan, ang ating mga puso at kaluluwa ay hinugis ng bawa't pagnanasa upang malutas ang mga problema. Sadyang tayo ay walang kapagurang galugarin ang bawa’t posibilidad upang maabot ang pinakamataas na antas ng pamumuhay.

Bagong panahon, bagong pangangailangan!

Bagong lipunan, bagong pagnanasa!

Batid ang pagbabago sa ating mundong ginagalawan. Ngunit marahil naitatanong natin sa ating mga sarili, nagbago na rin ba ang ating mga pagpapahalaga? Dinala ba ng alon ng pagbabago ang mga katangian nating mga Pilipino?

Isa sa mga hindi ko malilimutang alaala bilang isang residente ng Iligan ay ang kalunos-lunos na sitwasyong sinapit nito sa pananalasa ng bagyong Sendong. Hindi ko na kailangang ipaalala pa sa inyo ang katakot-takot na mga idinulot ng bagyo. Subalit sa gitna ng pagdadalamhati ng lahat, nangyari ang di natin inakalang magagawa ng bawat isa. Tayo ay nagkaisa upang bumangon, upang magsimula muli. At di natin maikakailang malaki ang papel na ginampanan ng mga makabagong uri ng komunikasyon upang mas mapalaganap ang apoy ng ating nararamdaman.

One for Iligan, Help CDO, Tabang Luzon at marami pang iba. Hindi ko mabilang kung ilang tao sa Facebook ang nagpalaganap ng adhikaing ito, kung ilang tao ang nag-tweet upang makatulong, kung ilang tao ang nagpalaganap ng mga mensahe gamit ang kainlang mga telepono upang maipaabot lamang sa bawat isa ang iisang hangarin, iisang mithiin.

Oo nga't hindi na uso ang bayanihan. Saan ka pa makakakita ngayon ng mga taong magbubuhat ng isang bahay upang ilipat ito sa isang bagong lugar? Subalit ang katangiang ito'y nanatili at nagbagong-anyo sa paglipas ng panahon. Ang talino at galing ng tao na siyang nagdulot ng mga makabagong paraan ng komunikasyon gaya ng social networking sites ay naging daan upang magkaroon ng makabagong bayanihan. Ang mga tao, saan mang sulok ng mundo ay magkakaisa. Hindi hadlang ang mga milya, hindi hadlang ang wika o kultura sapagkat ang pagkakaunawaan ay nasa puso.

Gaya ng bayanihan noon, ang makabagong bayanihan ay nagbigay ligaya sa ating mga kababayan. Dahil sa tulong ng marami, nagkaroon muli ng mga bahay ang mga nasalanta at nabigyan ng pagkakataong makapagsimula muli. Higit sa lahat, naipakita natin na tayo bilang magkakakapatid ay nandiyan parin para sa isa't isa.

Ito ang itatak natin sa ating mga isipan: na ang mga makabagong uri ng pakikipagtalastasan ay ating gamitin sa mabuting paraan tungo sa pagkakaisa ng sambayanan. Sana'y matanto natin na ang mga bagay na ito ay may mas mataas na paggagamitan at iyon ay ang magbunga ng makabagong bayanihan.

Ngayon tatanungin ko kayo ulit.

“What's on your mind?”

At sa pagkakataong ito naway hindi lamang ang laman ng inyong isip ang inyong isagot kundi ang laman rin ng inyong puso.

Maraming salamat po.