BATTLING INNER WARS By JanMell DugenioIt saddens me to confirm that a person's expectations of ideal relationships between his group is never enough to make it come true. We just have to accept that it is very hard, if not impossible, to impose a certain feeling to anyone, who is not willing to empathize. That is, the "Utopic" bond that is referred to in the note, will never be achieved in the truest sense of the adjective. We just have to face that. The real deal is appreciating the most of the happy moments that we all share, directly or vicariously.
True, for most, this may be the last time classmates will experience themselves as classmates, and probably the next time we see each other, we might refer to the word "classmates" as a thing of the past. However, friendship never dwells on the whims of time. It would be such a waste to sulk over things instead of growing up and realizing that SHALLOW CONFLICTS, and the even SHALLOWER REASONS behind them drag us to our immature selves which we want to get away from.
The ChE group is a brew of the different personalities available on earth. We have enough fluidity to mix with each others interests, yet we all want to stand alone. There's no problem with that. The consequence is some people, love the feeling of standing alone more than mingling with others. That's the problem. There's only one solution-- Leave them alone. Mind you, efforts like this actually contribute more to the rapport of the group than forcibly dragging them to group events which they don't wanna go.
The ChE students are intelligent, and we think a lot. That's a very good thing. However, it is IRONIC to say that in the course of thinking a lot, some people ONLY THINK OF THEMSELVES. It is perfectly fine to think a bout oneself. It's normal, it's human, it's Darwinian. But to ONLY think of one's self, that's another thing.
It seems that the whole point of your note is in UNITY. But it seems, as you might have observed, that the ChE lot gave a whole new meaning to that word. I can remember a previous ChE higher year student lauding our batch because they can see that we are tightly bound together. But that was because we are in for something to win. It was because we have a certain ambition which united our ideals. That is the point. Some may not participate in beach parties, or involve in drinking sprees but comfort your mind in the thought that everybody will participate if given an impetus that best serves everyone. It may not be "barkada-like" or it may not be what we love to think about- camping together, laughing, without any hint of hidden hurt feelings, but it is the best that we can expect from the group I describe as coming from different planets who came here to befriend each other. Everyone of us has a different view of friendship and companionship, depending on which planet they came from. One cannot simply inflict his notions on certain things based on his own planet.
We are not united, YES. Just look and examine the fibers. Cheap, Rinjers, Baguio girls, Apao boys, So fakes, and other groups that might pop without my knowledge. It is not a comforting thought, that some still bears the stigma of a previous misunderstanding and some still has certain conflicts. It is even on a sadder note, that everybody has already lived with this, and if there should be a significant turning point towards a UTOPIC bond, I'm afraid it is not on this final year.
We are UNITED, yes. Not in a conventional sense. We share laughs, we share plans, we compete together until our opponents experience hell. This is the closest we could get to the UTOPIC BOND. A conscious effort to patch things up, would only leave a bigger hole. Our goodwill towards each other is not "plastic", it is just the act of mature individuals, who believe that despite differences, everyone should act properly and help each other. A new sense of Unity is called upon, some may refer to it as "fake", but I don't think so and I contend to say it's all we have. No one should be blamed, because everybody's differences equally contributes.
[06.17.10]
True, for most, this may be the last time classmates will experience themselves as classmates, and probably the next time we see each other, we might refer to the word "classmates" as a thing of the past. However, friendship never dwells on the whims of time. It would be such a waste to sulk over things instead of growing up and realizing that SHALLOW CONFLICTS, and the even SHALLOWER REASONS behind them drag us to our immature selves which we want to get away from.
The ChE group is a brew of the different personalities available on earth. We have enough fluidity to mix with each others interests, yet we all want to stand alone. There's no problem with that. The consequence is some people, love the feeling of standing alone more than mingling with others. That's the problem. There's only one solution-- Leave them alone. Mind you, efforts like this actually contribute more to the rapport of the group than forcibly dragging them to group events which they don't wanna go.
The ChE students are intelligent, and we think a lot. That's a very good thing. However, it is IRONIC to say that in the course of thinking a lot, some people ONLY THINK OF THEMSELVES. It is perfectly fine to think a bout oneself. It's normal, it's human, it's Darwinian. But to ONLY think of one's self, that's another thing.
It seems that the whole point of your note is in UNITY. But it seems, as you might have observed, that the ChE lot gave a whole new meaning to that word. I can remember a previous ChE higher year student lauding our batch because they can see that we are tightly bound together. But that was because we are in for something to win. It was because we have a certain ambition which united our ideals. That is the point. Some may not participate in beach parties, or involve in drinking sprees but comfort your mind in the thought that everybody will participate if given an impetus that best serves everyone. It may not be "barkada-like" or it may not be what we love to think about- camping together, laughing, without any hint of hidden hurt feelings, but it is the best that we can expect from the group I describe as coming from different planets who came here to befriend each other. Everyone of us has a different view of friendship and companionship, depending on which planet they came from. One cannot simply inflict his notions on certain things based on his own planet.
We are not united, YES. Just look and examine the fibers. Cheap, Rinjers, Baguio girls, Apao boys, So fakes, and other groups that might pop without my knowledge. It is not a comforting thought, that some still bears the stigma of a previous misunderstanding and some still has certain conflicts. It is even on a sadder note, that everybody has already lived with this, and if there should be a significant turning point towards a UTOPIC bond, I'm afraid it is not on this final year.
We are UNITED, yes. Not in a conventional sense. We share laughs, we share plans, we compete together until our opponents experience hell. This is the closest we could get to the UTOPIC BOND. A conscious effort to patch things up, would only leave a bigger hole. Our goodwill towards each other is not "plastic", it is just the act of mature individuals, who believe that despite differences, everyone should act properly and help each other. A new sense of Unity is called upon, some may refer to it as "fake", but I don't think so and I contend to say it's all we have. No one should be blamed, because everybody's differences equally contributes.
[06.17.10]
I just think the word ChE does not apply to all. PLease specify that what you are talking about is about your batch.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, unity is an ambitious word. Differences can embark you away from this word but I think this can also magnetized you to it. You said that you were once united. You were one - and that was because, you said, you had a common goal. Why not try it again this time. It doesn't matter how many divided isles you have in your batch, what matter most is that you are a batch. Set your minds just like what you did before, but now for a different situation. Now, there's no competition. Now is just a marathon towards your common dream this year. Try to understand each other as your 1st step.
@anonymous: Yes, I'm talking about my batch of ChE students and not ChE as a whole.
ReplyDeleteYou're right that we should set our minds to our common goal this year, a different "contest" which we should win.
i always look back into the past but i never imagined i am able to look into the future, and the forthcoming that i was able to perceive was a dark and gloomy one. you may never know anybody being alone longer than i was and i've had a lot of experiences when it comes to being lonesome and forlorn.
ReplyDeletecompunction was never a great feeling and if i had the power to change sorrow into bliss then i wont hold back. but it was never intended for man to carry such aptitude for it would expunge a lot of meaning to the word FRIENDS.
what i was after for was not an unmitigated or ideal relationship but an atmosphere of true and veritable bond. and if my blight insight about taking a small step in reconstructing on what was inevitable was not right, then i ask for exoneration for i am only human capable of making humanly mistakes.
joBobit: Lovely name, and obviously, if you're not using a thesaurus, you yourself are the thesaurus. Your "blight insight about taking a small step in reconstructing on what was inevitable" did not afforded you mistakes. It is a mere vanity and no one's gonna persecute you for that. But a true and veritable bond, as I argued, would never be the true and veritable bond that we commonly think it is. A different kind is within all of us, and although it's not usual, it is not also a bad thing. Everybody has lived with it, and I commend you for wriggling out.
ReplyDeleteactually nag nosebleed jud ko sa mga comments kay english man gud..basta mu stick jud ko sa concept sa entropy..whatever we do, mag increase na jud and disorderliness..so bisan pa ug unsa ka united and undivided ang isa ka group, sooner or later, ma weak jud ang bond ana kay dili man jud forever ang pagka BS ChE..5 years lang(pero 6 yrs ko,hehe)..and at this point, kalimtan na lang sa nato ang pagka gubot uy..last year na man gud ni ninyo so mag enjoy na lang ta kay bisan pa ug unsa ka gubot, mingaw bya..joker siya na idea,pero LABANAN NATIN ANG ENTROPY..hahaha..
ReplyDelete